distortion

"missing you is a part of moving on."

people often says that.

saying that i miss you doesnt mean i want you back in my life.

fullstop.

same goes to 'i like you' or 'i adore you.'

saying that i like you doesnt mean i want you in my life. it is just a life cycle. i like you. you like me. i hate you. you hate me. it is only a feeling distraction.

i am not a person who will easily fall in love. love is subjective. too broad. too wide. too common. yet very powerful to build and destroy.

macam ni lah. aku minat dia. and aku tak bagi tahu sape sape pun. sebab aku tahu perasaan minat tu nanti akan pudar. just aku memang niat nak kawan dengan dia. so berkawan lah aku dengan dia. until one day he confessed. "aku suka kau sebenarnya."

but he knows. aku dah ada yang punya. so he is fine with it. jadi kawan pun dah okay. for me. friendship is important. losing a friendship is more heartbroken than losing a lover. unless aku terkawan dengan kawan yang perangai binatang. tu boleh pergi mati. 

to you my dearest. you never left. you always here. *tangankanandidada*

p/s: "lidah tu lagi tajam daripada pedang." now i know why.